Should corona or an accident abruptly end your life, are you ready to go in peace, i.e., without anxieties? How do you want your burial, who should make critical decisions like cutting off the oxygen supply? No more resuscitation, or some such severe ailment? What should be done with your things, how, and who is going to take care of your dependent loved ones?
Writing a will is not complicated, you can actually handwrite, or write on your computer, sign it and share the copies with your trusted friends. Then keep revising and updating whenever you get a chance.
Please consult an attorney after you have done your work, If you don’t have the time, what you have done is good enough.
The purpose of this essay is three-fold – bringing clarity to your wishes, taking away the anxieties and restoring peace of mind to you and your loved ones.
You have a choice to tie the loose ends of your life, completing your incomplete transactions of life, clean the slate of your life, and go in peace without tensions. Of course, you are going to live for several years, in that case, you have your “xhit” together.
If you don’t have a will – there will be fights among the survivors, if you have more than one survivor, it might go to the state or someone associated with you can rob what you have earned and deny it to the rightful owners of your hard-earned money. All that you have will be lost.
One of the individuals I knew, a rich guy who owned a few businesses, died in a car accident. He did not have the will, and his “friends” took over the company leaving his wife and kids with nothing. Let that not happen to your loved ones.
Here is a piece of advice in every religious tradition, ask God for anything you want. Don’t you think God knows what you want? Of course, he does but wants you to be clear about what you are asking. The intent is to help you move from confusion to coherence, and from chaos to clarity. Clarity brings focus, and focus produces solutions and relief.
A Genie pops up from the bottle and tells, “Ask what you want?” The old lady was all confused about what to ask and was blabbering. Genie gets frustrated and asks the old lady again, Lady, I cannot give you everything taking away your blindness, making you wealthy, or providing you with a grandchild and bla bla bla. Just ask me one thing clearly what you want, and I shall give. The lady gathers herself up and utters a short sentence with superb clarity. “I want to see my grandchild eat in a silver spoon.” One smart lady!
Make a list for each one of the following items and write what needs to be done, so the person you choose can execute your will and bring relief to the survivors.
First, the easy thing.
Write down your emergency contact numbers. Please take a 3×5 card or a piece of paper – and list key numbers on it and stick it in your purse/wallet. You can also list numbers as Emergency numbers on your cell phone. This is so critical. Video – 1-minute video message https://www.facebook.com/150223454997533/videos/390244995007634/
In case of last-minute care, should you be resuscitated or let go? How do you want your burial? Where do you wish to be buried? In case that is not possible, are you ok with other alternatives? Are you an organ donor? Who should make that decision for you? Any metallic object in the body and other medical issues, list as many as you can. Don’t wait to have a perfect will. Get it done now, then, later on, revise and complete it.
List everything that is yours and note what you want to be done with each item. The list can be long – cats, dogs, goats, cows, camels, bikes, cars, furniture, computers, cash, art collection, jewelry, 401 k, stocks, bonds, loans to your friends. Add copyrights, trademarks, patents, life insurance, accidental insurance, auto insurance, home insurance, books, and of course, you home (it’s for all people, that is the reason for goats, cows, and camels).
List everything you owe and what to do with it: mortgage payments, automobile payments, student loans, loans to family members, and friends.
3. Other Items
Passwords to Facebook, twitter, linked-in, and other social media. Code to the banks’ safe deposit box, the system to your secure box at home. Promises you have made to others, and others have made to you. Apologies to the ones you have hurt, and apologies to be sought from others who have hurt you. What is on your computer.
Who should get what, make that clear, identify items—family members, friends, charities, etc.? My mother left a great example; she left some gift items and some money in a bag a week before she passed away with instructions to open after her death. We opened it – she had designated everything in that bag to whom it should go. We did as she wanted.
If you have minor children, talk to family members or friends who could take care of them, and if you have funds, assign them the funds for caring for your children or older parents. There are bad stories out there, think it thoroughly.
It is a person you trust and assign the responsibility to carry out your wishes listed in your will. Most people will not want money for their service, but you can dedicate some funds for their work. My sister and her family took care of two daughters of my youngest brother after his death, out of their love for the family.
All the above can be handwritten or typed. All you need is two people to witness it. The minimum is if you can get a notary to witness the signatures. The maximum is to get an attorney to do the paperwork.
Once signed, make sure a copy of the will is in the hands of family members or friends. Place one in your bank safe deposit box if you have one, and one in a safe place in your home or with a friend. In case the house gets burned down. Let it be in two envelopes, medical will to be opened immediately, and the other will to be opened upon death.
Don’t postpone it, do it today. Start making a list. If you have any questions, feel free to ask or send an email to MikeGhouse@gmail.com. I will be happy to send a detailed checklist.
If you have time, you can watch this video about tying the loose ends of life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Tsu2hqH6q0